Antonio Delapaz

What’s good!

I’m big on being real, and I want to talk to someone who will accept me for who I am.

I’m from Dallas (PG). The city life is part of who I am. So, you already know I’m a die-hard Cowboys fan 🙂 I also love shoes: J’s and 95 Air Max. I never cared for Gucci or Prada glasses. I prefer Versace glasses- that’s just my style. I don’t know about you, but I grew up listening to Lil Boosie, Webbie, Z-ro, Lil’ Keke, Pimp C. But now, I vibe to anything.

I’ve always been motivated; though back then, I used my motivation for the wrong reasons. Now, I use this strength to challenge myself positively. Working out and staying fit is a major part of my life. I would love to do CrossFit. I’ve also earned my Bachelor’s Degree.

I love helping others reach their potential. I teach classes that guys in here need for their parole requirements. I don’t care if I got a lot of time, I know I can make a difference by pouring into the lives of the guys around me. I’m given the freedom to go talk to those who are in solitary, closed custody, and medium custody. I realize now that everything I experienced has helped me relate to these bros, who just want someone to listen to them and offer them true hope. I love it! 🙂

This is just a preview of my life. I’d like to hear from you!

Antonio

Lockdown

How could I best describe prison life to you? Perhaps the closest thing you ever got to rubbing shoulders with prison life was watching shows like “Gangland”, “Lockup” or “Orange is the New Black.” But if I could let you see through my eyes and feel with my hands my world, you would start to understand the great unknown.

As I’m penning this essay, I’m on “lockdown” in a maximum security prison. In Texas, each prison has to go on lockdown, at least once a year. During this time, the guards do a thorough search of the prison and of us for any contraband. There is no movement; we must stay in the cell (9×5 ft.) with a celly. It’s like being locked inside your own bathroom with someone else. And who knows, you may or may not be cool with this person.

The phones get turned off and commissary is closed. So our only means of communication is through letters. And if you don’t have any groceries in your locker, you’re stuck eating the brown Johnny Sacks, with only two sandwiches inside, three times a day. Thankfully, we can have visits and mail. But because the Beto Unit is big, housing 3,500 men, lockdowns can take anywhere from two weeks to a month. You’re probably wondering “how in the world do you survive lockdowns?”

To be honest, I still haven’t figured it out. Once you’re thrust into a situation like the one I am in, your survival instinct kicks in. You work with what you got. You may think I’m crazy, but the steel bunk I lay on is a king size bed. My radio is my smart TV; it’s my access to good music and current news. My books are portals into different worlds, where I meet new characters and gain an appreciation of the world I live in. Though small as it may be, the cell is also my gym. The shelf becomes my pull-up bar. My commissary bag, filled with bottled water, becomes my curl bar. So, after a good workout, the sink becomes my shower. I hang a sheet up for privacy and get cleaned up. Because there’s no A/C, my two fans are my A/C unit. The toilet must always be bleached; it turns into my washing machine and I have clothes lines all over the cell. And when I write letters, that’s the moment I can have a genuine and sincere conversation with someone on the other side of this fence.

So, I asked my celly, “what I just wrote; does it sound like I’m crazy?” He said, “not to me, maybe to them it might because they don’t know how it’s like in here, especially during lockdown.”

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• Incarcerated Since: 2010
• Sentence Received: 30 years to life
• Earliest Release: 2040

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