Kyle is 39 and incarcerated in the US (VA).
HA! Victory is mine! I’ve finally managed to wriggle out of my Technicolour straitjacket and have successfully distracted the screws with contraband XXX nudie mags! But wait! Here’s a delightful conundrum: now that I’ve got the opportunity to tell you all about myself, just what am I to say that will compel you to take that dizzying first step into the Great Unknown of a brand-spanking new friendship? There’s so much to say–where do begin?!?!
Oh! I know!!!
Hi Freeworld peoples! *waving energetically* I am The Kyle and I’m the bestest friend you never had! “The Kyle” isn’t just a name, though, it’s a state of mind!
I’m that guy your Mother warned you about: a hyperactive super-cool-awesome wildcard with a wicked Cheshire grin, devastating charm and *way* more imagination, curiosity, and free time than can possibly be good for either of us! I may be barking mad, but your life is definitely going to be more interesting because of it! Come on, give in to the Happy-Happy-Joy-Joy Dance–You *know* you want to!
Are you fun and interesting or, even better, really strange? Do you giggle uncontrollably at wildly inappropriate moments, or for no reason at all? Do you desperately wish your life were like your favorite Anime? Are you crazy for all things Japanese? Do you believe the world would be a better place if more people lightened up and gave in to whimsical flights of fancy or random acts of senseless Beauty? Is there way too much blood in your caffeine system? Do you have tattoos, piercings, or body modifications (and if so, will you show them to me?)? Do you have lots of awesome, interesting or exotic pets? Do you have a job doing something wicked cool? Are you a tortured soul expressing yourself through art, poetry, music, or photography? Do you believe in magick, Dragons or Fairies? Have you ever been abducted by aliens (or wish you had been)? Do you search for the impossible in everyday life? Do you know deep in your heart that there is more to this world, beyond sight and sound and touch? Are you a pathetically hopeless Romantic with more optimistic idealism than is probably good for you? Do you have room in your life for the madcap antics of a slightly demented, caffeine addled eccentric?
Then why the frak aren’t you writing to me yet?!?!
Happy Thought (An Invitation)
Watching raindrop patterns on my window
Thinking of friends far away
I’m hoping a letter comes tonight-
The perfect end to my day
If you sing me a song, I’ll tell you my Happy Thought
If you tell me a story, I’ll share all the wishes I’ve caught
If you bring me riddles to solve, you’ll find me up to the task
That you show me something new is all that I ask
I have learned to catch the laughter in all my tears
To see the foolishness of all my greatest fears
For I have learned that Love only comes to hearts that believe
And it gives most to those with the greatest need
I’ll show you my world if you can befriend a stray
I promise you’ll like it here: there are new wonders every day
So sing me a song, my Happy Thoughts are yours
Listen, and you’ll hear them whisper as softly as a lion roars…
• Date of Birth: 09/02/1983 (39 years old)
• Gender: Male
• Marital Status: Married
• Sexual Orientation: Straight
• Race: White
• Ethnicity: N/A
• Eye Color: Green
• Hair Color: Brown
• Height: 6 ft. 1 in.
• Body Type: Average
• Hometown: NIMH
• Spoken Languages: English, can write Elvish + Futhark
• Religion: Wiccan – Tradition of Lothloriën
• Astrological Sign: Virgo
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• Incarcerated Since: 2001
• Sentence Received: Life Without Parole
• Earliest Release: N/A